A request came in to make this available in one easy-to-access post/link. Here it is. This is our unprecedented four-part, four-object, four-auction story. This is an incredibly difficult task to pull off, but we got the four members of Kasper Hauser to assemble what we think is a really wonderful extended piece.

Pencil Case + Rob Baedeker Story starts things off, and if you read that you’ll discover there are links at the bottom of each installment that will lead you to the next. Part two is Gaucho Tray + James Reichmuth Story, followed by Bronco Toy + Dan Klein Story, and concluding with “Brass” Pitcher + John Reichmuth Story. I love the way the pieces work together, and I really think they benefit from being read sequentially — to me, they’ve gotten better on each read-through. And I have to say, this kind of crazy, “can it be done?” experimentation is what makes S.O. worthwhile to me. So I hope you agree. And I really want to say a public thanks to the KH guys for taking this up.

There are some interesting questions, of course, about how this strategy might affect bidding. We’ll address those when it’s over. All I’ll say for now is: Remember, proceeds benefit Girls Write Now.

No. 15 of 50 -- Significant Objects, v3

[This is the first installment in a four-part story by the members of Kasper Hauser. The auction for this object, with story by John Reichmuth, has ended. Original price: $3.00. Final price: $15.50. Significant Objects will donate the proceeds of this auction to Girls Write Now.]

A violiner, a fifer, some apples, a small girl holding a bunny by its fore-ears. These were the images depicted on my dad Dale’s mung pitcher. When I was 13 and learning how to use this the East Coast Way, as an inconvenience preferred because of its gravitas, like a fine old two-edged razor or a whale-hide jumping rope, Dad, the traitor, with a cigarette in his moist mouth, bailed out the cocoa in the toilet and sprayed grandiosely: “The Carpys practically invented mung bailers.”

This one depicts the first Halloween, but when I used it to bail mung at Wesleyan, in Vietnam, in Phoenix, and now on my deathbed in Miami, my start-a-zoo plan in the dump, I would imagine I saw Abe Lincoln, a state trooper, Mother Teresa, even a hippie girl, anything, anything to get my mind off the revolting stench of the mung.

Last week Gene Lightfoot, the guide, and I brought this pitcher in the swamp-boat for luck or to piss in. Now there’s a scuff on the top of where I tried to fend off the alligator that really ripped my foot off.

No. 14 of 50 — Significant Objects, v3

[This is the third installment in a four-part story by the members of Kasper Hauser. The auction for this object, with story by Dan Klein, has ended. Original price: 50 cents. Final price: $38.50. Significant Objects will donate the proceeds of this auction to Girls Write Now.]

I commissioned this sculpture of Fries n’ a Shake in 1990, or thereabouts. He was a great horse. A zoo horse. The sculpture commemorates the moment Fries n’ a Shake realized that zoos are a godsend and that work sucks. This is him kicking down the doors to get back in. I saw this happen while I was hosing down some lizards, and it made a huge impression on me.

Two days later is the day that Joanie left me the origami note. She and Dad were gone. The oldest girlfriend I ever had. But at least I had a new mission in life: a zoo that wasn’t racist against livestock.

Tomorrow, The Conclusion: “Brass” Pitcher.

No. 13 of 50 — Significant Objects v3

[This is the second installment in a four-part story by the members of Kasper Hauser. The auction for this object, with story by James Reichmuth, has ended. Original price: $1.00. Final price: $10.50. Significant Objects will donate the proceeds of this auction to Girls Write Now.]

One thing I won’t need if I open my own zoo is a lot of crap holding me back. Or sentimental/highly-valuable things:

This is a ’60s-era Mexican “Madero-type” of my dad, Dale Carpy; if you’re looking at this, you know what it is and how rare to have the original knots in excellent condition.

The photographer really captured Dale about to spring. Trust me, this wasn’t him just relaxing and smoking a joint. He was coiled up like a cat.

We probably drank 100,000 margaritas off of this tray, Joanie and I. I loved ‘em so much that she called me the “slushen-pumpy.”

Dad and Joanie getting a boat together, I admit it, really got me from my blind side.

Tommow: Part Three: Toy Bronco.

No. 12 of 50 — Significant Objects v3

[This is the first installment in a four-part story by the members of Kasper Hauser. The auction for this object, with story by Rob Baedeker, has ended. Original price: $2.00. Final price: $15.50. Significant Objects will donate the proceeds of this auction to Girls Write Now.]

One night I looked at my saggy old beanbag, a sad black lump just lying on my living room floor like one of Bigfoot’s breasts.

That beanbag represented the old me.

I wear a Leatherman on my belt, and I gashed into that beanbag and didn’t stop sawing till I had a two-foot piece of leatherette.

That night I found a guy named LeatheretteBrad844@aol.com on the Internet who said he could do what I was looking for — make a pencil case with the texture of caiman (which is basically just a miniature alligator).

A lot of people choose alligator skin for their boots and cases, etc., but I chose the caiman to symbolize the conquering of a personal demon, but a demon of manageable size — to me, the idea that you could vanquish a full-on alligator is delusional. Start by wrestling the little guys. After you conquer your caimans, you can set your sites on the alligators.

I’m speaking symbolically, but I also used to work as a zookeeper, so I am actually pretty familiar with these kinds of reptiles/amphibians.

Now, I am hopping over the fence into the mind-work side of things — going back to finish my degree, with hopes of someday designing my own zoo or aquarium.

There are five pencils in the box. That’s my lucky number. I keep them unsharpened as a reminder of possibilities.

Tomorrow: Part Two: Gaucho Tray.

Starting with this.

Readers, we try to keep things interesting and surprising for you here at Significant Objects, not merely publishing great stories all the time, but throwing a curveball every now and again. We’ve done so by offering stories in comix form, by selling a Mystery Object, by holding a contest or two, by teaming up with Underwater New York to sell found objects, and so on.

Today we add to that list the debut of our first multi-part story: Four installments, four writers, four objects, over the next four days.

This is a challenging assignment, to say the least, but we’re pleased to announce that it’s been taken up and brilliantly met by the members of Kasper Hauser. The San Francisc0-based comedy troupe is well known for its books Obama’s Blackberry, Weddings of The Times, and The Skymaul Catalog. And they recently made an ad for Adult Swim! Check them out here for info on all of that and more.

The first installment of the four-part story will be published here later today; it’s by Rob Baedeker, who you will recall as the author of the brilliant Foppish Figurine story from v1. Wednesday, Thursday, and Friday, we’ll publish installments by his KH colleagues: Dan Klein, James Reichmuth, and John Reichmuth.

We hope you enjoy!And readers, as always, please help us spread the word. Thanks!