Pencil Case, part 1

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No. 12 of 50 — Significant Objects v3

[This is the first installment in a four-part story by the members of Kasper Hauser. The auction for this object, with story by Rob Baedeker, has ended. Original price: $2.00. Final price: $15.50. Significant Objects will donate the proceeds of this auction to Girls Write Now.]

One night I looked at my saggy old beanbag, a sad black lump just lying on my living room floor like one of Bigfoot’s breasts.

That beanbag represented the old me.

I wear a Leatherman on my belt, and I gashed into that beanbag and didn’t stop sawing till I had a two-foot piece of leatherette.

That night I found a guy named on the Internet who said he could do what I was looking for — make a pencil case with the texture of caiman (which is basically just a miniature alligator).

A lot of people choose alligator skin for their boots and cases, etc., but I chose the caiman to symbolize the conquering of a personal demon, but a demon of manageable size — to me, the idea that you could vanquish a full-on alligator is delusional. Start by wrestling the little guys. After you conquer your caimans, you can set your sites on the alligators.

I’m speaking symbolically, but I also used to work as a zookeeper, so I am actually pretty familiar with these kinds of reptiles/amphibians.

Now, I am hopping over the fence into the mind-work side of things — going back to finish my degree, with hopes of someday designing my own zoo or aquarium.

There are five pencils in the box. That’s my lucky number. I keep them unsharpened as a reminder of possibilities.

Tomorrow: Part Two: Gaucho Tray.


Rob Baedeker is a writer and performer living in Oakland, CA. He is a member of the comedy group Kasper Hauser, authors of SkyMaul: Happy Crap You Can Buy from a Plane , Weddings of the Times: A Parody (Kasper Hauser Comedy Group), and Obama's BlackBerry.

One thought on “Pencil Case, part 1

  1. Pingback: The Kasper Hauser Four-Part Story, all in one place | Significant Objects

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